The Golden Rule

Do you remember those little green stickers that your mom would put on the bottles of poison under your kitchen sink??? MR YUK.  He was that sticker that looked Yucky and you knew that if his yucky face was there it meant that is was poisonous!  Kids see it and stay away!
I have found through many trials that there are people that need one of those stickers on their forehead! Negative and critical people are just plain poisonous. Words can be full of deadly poison!

“But the tongue can no man tame; it is an unruly evil, full of deadly poison.”
​James 3:8

Did you ever ponder the first part of the verse…But the Tongue can no man tame?  NO MAN.  That means me.  That means YOU!  How many times have we been hurt and then we go tell the story of our hurts and hurt others with our words?  I know I have.  I have retaliated.  I have back bitten.  I am not spotless.  But neither are YOU!  We all do it.  And here is a little secret…I have NEVER met one single person that does not tell me a tale or two about another person behind that persons back.  NOT ONE!  Even really spiritual people that are looked up to in the church.  Yup, they do it too!  And it is wrong.  ​Do we like it when others say nasty things to us or when they say nasty things behind our backs?  NO, we do not.  Yet why do we do it?Have you ever pondered this?  I have to share something with you.  I have been studying this chapter of the book of James and it is interesting, one word he uses to describe what comes out of our mouth…

“Therewith bless we God, even the Father; and therewith curse we men, which are made after the similitude of God. Out of the same mouth proceedeth
blessing and cursing.
James 3: 9-10

Blessing & Cursing…definitions
Blessing: v.  express or feel gratitude to; thank
Curse: a
 solemn utterance intended to invoke a supernatural power to inflict harm or punishment on someone or something.

Cursing is usually thought of as using filthy language.  That is not the true definition.  An example you hear of in old story books is about witches who put curses on people to inflict harm.  It is a deadly form of poison.  God blesses but God also curses.  I have found God cursing several places in scripture.  I guess if anyone has the right to curse, it would be GOD since this is his creation and he has the right to call the shots.  Anytime people get in the business of cursing, you would think that they were trying to play God.  Since the beginning of time, Satan wanted to be like God, he wanted man to realize he could be like God, too.  And that is where sin entered in.

​Through the ages, witches and other people that choose the dark side choose to curse God instead of bless him.  They get busy with cursing and trying to harm others for gain.  And as a Christian, follower of Jesus, we do not want to be likened to a witch or some evil entity.  But in a spiritual realm, all the curses that come out of our mouth are meant for harming and it is poisonous.  People somehow do it because in some sick way the cursing makes them feel better—YIKES!

“Death and life are in the power of the tongue:
and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof.”
Proverbs 18:21

Life and Death!  That is how much power is in our words.  God spoke this world into existence.  With our words we condemn and we build up.  Sometimes we use our words to tear ourselves down, too.It is crazy how many people who profess to know Jesus go around and use that mouth they were given by God to be a blessing, to curse, complain, and poison others.  When a person says a negative thing about another person, it is like giving a shot of poison that infects that person.  It infects them because now they feel less of another person because of what information you just gave to them.  And the infection spreads.  They may even go and tell someone else!  By the time it gets back to the person, it is a twisted LIE from the pit of hell.  I have seen people’s reputations completely destroyed by rumors.  I have been a victim of this myself, and most people are too much a coward to handle it biblically anyhow.  It is just easier to whisper in someone’s ear than to go up to the person, be mature, and out of love share with the person what they have done to offend you.

The same mouth that says they love Jesus.  Then they curse and cast spells on others with their words.  And I just sit around wondering WHY, WHY do we do this?

Okay…If you have an offense you should go to that person, but I tell you, it better be a good reason because sometimes what others do is not a matter of sin, just you being a baby about it.  You getting your undees in a bundle WAY too quick!  AND I have a wish to put a MR YUK sticker right on your forehead because no one likes people that are constantly finding fault, constantly bringing stuff to your attention that they do not approve of.

If someone comes to me about something silly, I will give them a couple chances to point their finger at me until I STAY AWAY from them!  I soon realize that this person is just plain trouble.  They are looking for it all the time.  Instead of looking for ways to bless you, they love to find the one little thing they can point out to you that they feel is wrong, or something your kids did.  Wow, just think of that person on their HIGH HORSE when they get knocked down from our father in Heaven!

I still choose to love that person, smile, hug, and try to live at peace with them, but I use caution and I do not seek them out regularly for fellowship.

The funny thing about pointing out faults in others, is that you probably have the same issues, if not worse!  That is why it is ALWAYS important to do this one step first… ​

“Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother’s eye.”
Matthew 7:5

It is a blessing when you surround yourself with people that are not tearing you down, pointing out things, and treating you less than what they would like as their treatment.It is funny how you can have zero issues with some people, and they are zero drama, and zero negative, just fun to be around. And then you can be around other people who do such weird stuff like ignore you or crab at you about something. And it just feels like you got a shot of pure poison, again.

I have been labeled a drama queen, like as if I attract drama like bees to the honey, but I tell you what, I have experimented, there are just people out there that you just never want to tell them anything personal because they use those words like bullets and shoot them back at you later when they find good cause to nail you. And I have been around others that I can completely open up to and feel safe, I don’t bother in their business, and they don’t bother with mine, we have a common honor and respect for one another. ​It always comes back to the Golden Rule…

“And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul,
and with all thy mind, and with all thy strength: this 
is the first commandment.
And the second is like, namely this, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. There is none other commandment greater than these.”
Mark 12: 30-31

It would such a huge blessing if all people would learn how to love others as themselves and treat others like they would want to be treated. It is really special when you find other people who strive to live by the golden rule like you do. It is like finding a true treasure, it is very rare, but there are still people like that out there, Praise GOD!I have a friend who is NOT a Christian yet they LIVE by the Golden Rule.  This person holds firm to it and I find it interesting that most Christians do not hold firm to this biblical rule that is so important to God.  So important that he commanded it.  STOP this insanity!  We have GOT to behave better.  It is such a bad example.

I am so excited because I am studying more about the Golden Rule so I can do a better job being a better example myself, first, and in the process maybe some of it will spill over to my children and beyond that to others that are willing to learn.  God is good to teach us how to love our neighbor as ourself.I have started writing a book on how to deal with different kinds of people and how to still LOVE unconditionally.  Loving your Neighbor as yourself is a skill that can be developed for anyone.  While you may not be able to completely tame your tongue, you can learn some great habits that will help you focus on the right things.  In this book you will learn how to look past certain undesirable traits, look for the best in others, set up boundaries, forgive readily, and learn to live in peace with one another.  There are times where you can build bridges and other times where bridges must be burned.

Is it going to be easy? NOPE!  But is it possible?  Yes, with Christ all things are possible.  Christ lays a foundation for us with his example and instruction through his word.  I hope to take you on a journey through His word and help show you the way to achieve this one step at a time!

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2 thoughts on “The Golden Rule”

  1. YES! Preach!
    This is something I’ve though about a lot myself and it is so good to see that FINALLY I am not the only one who thinks this way.
    Sadly, we are surrounded by people who take great joy in talking bad about others, demeaning others – probably in order to feel better about themselves – and constantly trying to depict themselves as superior to others. I have even carefully confronted some of them with this issue – dude, you need to approach these people carefully because their self-esteem is so bloated, they’re not good at laughing about themselves, which is a sign for in fact pretty low self-esteem, all they ever do is cover it up – and they said it was “eat or be eaten”: like if you don’t put others low enough, they’ll put you down and you’ll end up lowest in the “food chain”. According to this you’d always have to make sure to find something negative or ridiculous about the people around you, just a little bit every day, to justify your “high” position in the social context.
    These are the people I’m living amongst. Yuck!
    Some always have to make sure they are noticed as “being on top”, all their motivation is to defend their place, their desired social status, and they’ll do everything to make people think they are the biggest fish in the pond. They don’t care if they’re being disrespectful of others, as long as they earn the image they want. Putting others down is seen as being tough, smart and even funny – that’s the problem with people. It is a cheap way to gain self-confidence, but is it just? Is it right?
    I don’t want to be this way. I don’t want to have to constantly prove myself in front of others. I don’t want to have to defend my position in the social “food chain”. I don’t want to talk empty words and fight pointless battles, shoot at others with pointy jokes just for the sake of earning respect. I don’t want to be destructive – especially not to others – for no reason.
    Well, I guess for most people that’s just great fun. And I don’t say I’ve never spoken badly about someone else – oh no, I am by far not innocent – but I get tired of it quickly and it’s not as rewarding to me.
    At a young age, I decided to follow God’s rules and to try and be a good Christian and in this ongoing process of learning how to do that, I more and more feel that the above depicted way of treating people just doesn’t go along with the values I want to pursue. And the hard consequence is that it seperates me from other people. Sadly, a lot of those I am befriended and acquainted with take pleasure in that self-centered behaviour I don’t want to be a part of. So in the end it’s me sacrificing social participation.
    But in the end, shouldn’t our rewards come from elsewhere? I want to take pride in myself without having to put others down, I want my self-esteem come from being a kind, considerate and smart person. I’d rather be thoughtful than loud and snappy. No other person should assign me my worth or self-worth, it is just not their decision who is a better or more admirable human.
    I like Matthew 7 a lot in this context:
    “Do not judge, or you too will be judged. 2 For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”
    “Do not give what is holy to the dogs, nor throw your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet and turn around and attack you.”
    I like this verse more in a different translation that literally says we shouldn’t give what is holy or what is valuable to us to those who don’t hold it in respect or don’t recognize its value. Because otherwise they’ll drag our faith in the mud and attack us afterwards.
    And yes, just as you said, fortunately there are still people you can hang out with effortless, which feels like a blessing compared to all these “drama” people. I am amazed myself to find out what a difference this makes.
    I could just ramble on and on about this… 😉
    Thank you for this post and the reflective thoughts!

  2. Amen! I have been dealing with sililiar situations. I did struggle for several days but the Lord was faithful to show me to love the person that was talking about me and taking shots here and therer picking at me and my kids. I did not need to Harbour bitterness but show love toward them. They were in need of prayer. I will be nice to them. But I do keep a distance from them. I will not talk on the phone or put myself in a situation where there is idle talk with them.
    God Bless:)

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